Adage: Believe It... Or Not.

The word for today is: adage. The Gedutis Lindsay Dictionary of Irish-Italian-Lithuanian-American English, arbiter of some very choice language, defines adage like this: 

a • dage
Something you hear
so freaking much
you actually almost believe it. 

Let us examine a few of these and decide for ourselves:
  • "Everyone says it so it must be true." Hmph. It's fun when adages are sarcastic.

  • "The early bird catches the worm." True. Any worm, when illuminated by the rising sun, is divine.

  • "You'll never know until you try." Mostly true. Example: Celebrities-turned-politicians. We tried that, and at first it seemed ok. Ronald Reagan: Didn't turn out too, too bad overall. Arnold Schwarzenegger: Not too bad, either, really. 

  • "Third time's a charm." LIE. See above.

  • "It's always darkest before the dawn." Dear lord, please let that be true. See above.

  • "You can't judge a book by its cover." TRUE. That $#!# with the huskies the other day: So nice! She's my new best friend now. Mostly because she laughed when I looked at her dogs and said, "Oh, here come the honor students." (If she only knew...)

  • "You can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear." Unclear. But we're trying. Lord, we're trying.

  • "The rising sun lifts all boats." Wait. That's not it. True, though. The walkers and runners were so friendly this glorious morning that this writer is compelled to use an exclamation point!

  • "Slow and steady wins the race." LIE. Example: You're having an amazing morning stroll with Fuzzbutt and, two miles from home, you realize that your daughter has to be at work in twenty minutes. Classic. Tortoises are total losers. (Don't. Ask.)

  • "The cleanest place in the world is a dog's mouth." GOD I HOPE SO.